Ranking NHL Mascots based on how badly I want to take them home to my family for Christmas

Dead last: Blades the Bruin, Boston Bruins. Have you seen this guy? He scares me, and I think that he would have terrible table manners, and piss off my grandma. Plus, he wouldn’t even dress up nice for Christmas Eve service. -10000000/10.

31-6: Who cares? Whoever else isn’t on this list. ???/10.

5: Youppi!, Montreal Canadiens. I’m actually pretty sure I wouldn’t even have to bring Youppi! home — he looks like he’s already a good ol’ Florida boy ready to bust down on some deviled eggs. 7/10.

4: Chance the Gila Monster, Vegas Golden Knights. I was originally intending to put a knight mascot on this list, but I think I was mixing up the Vegas Golden Knights with the University of Central Florida Golden Knights, who have a real actual golden knight mascot. That’s okay! I think Chance looks fun and friendly, and I’d love to bring him home for Christmas. 7.6/10.

3: Iceburgh, Pittsburgh Penguins. He’s my guy, ya know? He seems polite, and I think he’d get along great with my mom without making any waves at the function. Plus, I think a little vacation might be good for him after the season his team is having. 8.5/10.

2: Stanley C. Panther, Florida Panthers. Just look at this guy! He belongs in Florida, what can I say? I can see it now… He’d fit right in sitting on the floor of my maternal grandmother’s living room, catching the gifts being tossed at us from the Christmas tree. Stanley would be right in his element as we left out pizza and Coke for Santa, and he wouldn’t stir at all at the sound of reindeer paws on the roof. It’d be a very happy holiday, indeed. 9.8/10.

1: Gritty, Philadelphia Flyers. Oh my god… I just know he would piss my father off. He is an absolute menace. I think that Gritty is what Blades WISHES he could be. Gritty is literally him. He’s burning down my house and caking all of my relatives, but then he’s absolutely CRUSHING in our yearly game of Cards Against Humanity. I know for certain that my mom would think he’s hilarious, and bringing joy to my mom is all I strive for in life. 1000000/10.