By Lora Kallenberg and Haley Williams
Warning: Some spoilers ahead!
As two college students with no desire to travel internationally and cushy on-campus jobs where we could earn some extra cash, we decided to stay in Pittsburgh for spring break and take on a task greater than any other: knocking movies off of our lengthy Letterboxd watchlists. Together, we compiled a joint list of movies comprised of rewatches and completely new films we’d been dying to see (along with accompanying drinking games for some, which are noted by an asterisk*). There is absolutely no cohesion in this listing of movies, and yes, it was a wild ride.
“Get Out” (2017)*
Haley: I finally understand all of the memes that came from this movie!
Lora: The sunken place haunts my very literal nightmares!
“Gattaca” (1997)
H: I too would incinerate myself if my gay boy best friend went to space. (He never saves anything for the swim back.)
L: How to have your life depend on the love from your homoerotic stay-at-home star-crossed best friend and from your boss bitch work wife (Uma Thurman my beloved).
“Dungeons and Dragons” (2023)*
H: One of the rules for this was “Drink anytime there’s a sweeping shot of the landscape” and I did not say it correctly one single time. It was always “sweeping landshape scots.” Also Xenk please hit me up — I’m single and I love your awkward rizz. Please Xenk please.
L: How to solve your mommy issues with the power of a new, ripped, butch bisexual mother — by the way, there is only one dragon. Some dungeons though.
“The Mask” (1994)
H: Milo is the true hero of this movie; justice for Milo.
L: How to… just kidding, I loved the true star of this film: Carmen Miranda.
“Dr. Strangelove” (1964)*
H: Could’ve used more Peter Sellers characters.
L: Where’s Oppy when all this is happening (also what is happening)?
“Kubo and the Two Strings” (2016)
H: Me when I hear Matthew McConaughey: Alright alright alright.
L: There were more than two strings in this movie. 👎 (Just kidding but if there is another animated movie made about grief and a child’s relationship with their parents I’m ending it all.)
“Little Miss Sunshine” (2006)*
H: One of the rules for this was “Drink when someone says ‘Frank’” and we nearly died. Also emo Paulo Dano my beloved <3.
L: Surely nothing will go wrong when you put five clearly mentally ill people in a car with a starry-eyed child who wants to be a pageant queen.
“Newsies” (1992)
H: Absolutely horrible, but also wonderful. Don’t watch this. Just watch Christian Bale’s cowboy dance.
L: You’re telling me this man would go on to become Patrick Bateman after being so silly, goofy, and woefully poor in NYC?
“Mean Girls” (2024)
H: Sometimes I get scared and think, “What if I’m faking? What if I’m actually straight?” Then I just think about Reneé Rapp as Regina George, and I’m cured of all doubt.
L: Aside from the tremendous autotune on a certain non-singing actress, Reneé Rapp changed my life along with fellow plastics Avantika Vandanapu and Bebe Wood. AND MY FAV AULI’I CRAVALHO <3.
“All of Us Strangers” (2023)
H: I thought I was gonna be sobbing by the end of this, but I was mostly just confused.
L: Our favorite celibate priest looks a little different here… but Andrew Scott is a gem.
“Thelma and Louise” (1991)*
H: Through the power of lesbianism and cowboy babygirl Brad Pitt, you too can make one of the best movies of all time!
L: But ay mamá, what do you do when your dreams come true (for someone else and it was Thelma and Louise living out the true lesbian dream: killing men, robbing people, having first orgasms, and dying with your arguably lesbian lover in a fabulous car crash after the largest police chase in history)?
^Kudos to anyone who gets my “In the Heights” reference
“Rocky” (1976)*
H: Yo Adrian, it’s me, Rocky! (Original Himbo, I love him so much)
L: ADRIAAAAAAAAN (shout out to my boys Cuff and Link, the realest turts alive).
“Ex Machina” (2014)
H: I don’t know what I was expecting but it wasn’t this! Oscar Isaac sure as hell tore up that dance floor, though.
L: They should’ve played Sophie Ellis-Bextor’s “Murder on the Dancefloor” at the end; Ava walked so Oliver Quick could run!
“Schindler’s List” (1993)
H: The list didn’t show up until like 2.5 hours in.
L: Schindler didn’t even write the list — JUSTICE FOR STERN.
“Senseless” (1998)
H: YYEEEEAAAAHHHH PUNK MATTHEW LILLARD!!!!!!
L: The real college life: doing questionable research studies for cash (I have done questionable research studies for cash).
“Spirited Away” (2001)
H: Oh Lord, “I knew you were good!” got me 😭
L:
“SK8 the Infinity” (2021)
(Yes we are aware this is a show but we only had two episodes left and had to finish it.)
H: God they’re so gay (affectionate). Minus one point for gross pedophilic-coded villain.
L: TAKE ME TO THE TOP I’M SLIDING THROUGH THE DARK TOKIHANATE NOBODY KNOWS I’M BURNING LIKE A FIRE!
“Moonlight” (2016)*
H: Dear God, Janelle Monet just give me one chance. Please God, I’m begging I’ll treat you so right.
L: As I said the night we watched this, I too would give anything to see the first person who helped me realize I’m gay again, just to talk <3
“The Truman Show” (1998)*
H: For some reason I thought that him being on a show was a twist ending. It’s literally in the title of the movie. And if I don’t see you again, good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight!
L: I basically watched this entire film through clips on TikTok because I’m chronically online, but damn, I didn’t think there’d be so many malfunctions in the show’s production. It was LITERALLY falling apart.
“Fried Green Tomatoes” (1991)
H: This was the very last movie we watched, ending at like 2 a.m. on Sunday after watching movies since about 10 a.m. the previous morning. I lowkey don’t remember anything except that they were gay and Cathy Bates is a girlboss.
L: Had to keep telling Haley that the random old lady was just being kooky and retelling her life story of being a badass butch lesbian in the third person for dramatic effect. 12/10 another amazing film about lesbians killing men.
*Want to truly replicate our experience? Try this drink recipe!
To make the drink which we have lovingly named Blicky, you’ll need a few ingredients:
- Sangria: You can use any recipe you like, but we used a dupe for Red Lobster’s Triple Berry Sangria.
- Baja Blast: Out of the fountain is preferred, but bottled is fine.
- Butterfly ice cubes: This is non-negotiable. They may not be in any other shape.
In your serving vessel of choice, mix one part Baja Blast with one part sangria. Serving in pickle jars is preferred, but not required. Add butterfly ice cubes to your liking, and then enjoy your glass of Blicky with your movie and drinking game of choice!
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