It has become a huge deal to not care. Caring has become a bad thing to do. “Why do you care so much?” “Why are you so obsessed with this?” “It’s not that deep.” But for EdBoard, it is that deep. Here at EdBoard, we care. We are attached. We wear our hearts on our sleeves. As a student at Carnegie Mellon University, you’re (ideally) studying something that you are deeply passionate about. So why is it that we are not confronted with excitement and passion everywhere on campus? Feelings of nonchalance are the stasis for so many, what do we lose when we live life without caring?
Oftentimes we feel embarrassed to care about things that we feel or think aren’t important enough to care about. But who is in charge of designating what is and isn’t important? In “La La Land” Mia learns to care about jazz because she sees how passionate Sebastian is about jazz music. It could be said that as people, we are more inclined to care about things when we see just how greatly people care about their interests. However, if this is true, then the latter would account for why we are oftentimes incredibly hesitant to proclaim our appreciation and passion for things that aren’t widely recognized as “worth it.”
This raises the question: how much do others’ perceptions of us and our interests shape how we approach those interests themselves? Nowadays it feels as if we are meant to be cringing at everything. It’s upsetting to observe how being genuine has seemingly turned into something we are expected to cringe at. Cringe has turned into an indication that something shouldn’t be engaged with rather than viewed as a temporary discomfort that you can acknowledge and move on from. When Lady Gaga wore the meat dress, people hated it — unless they saw it as “camp”. In queer media there is a celebration of camp, but how does one understand the divide between camp and cringe? Camp is arguably becoming mainstream. Having been a theme at the Met Gala there is discourse about whether we designate things that read as strange to the general public should earn the designation of camp. The key difference between “strange” and “camp” could be seen as sincerity. John Waters’ films are camp because they are sincere in their vulgarity and shock factor.
“Othering” can be observed as a separate motivation for not wanting others to think that you care about something as much as you do. With art that subverts expectations or is slightly off the beaten path, people immediately question the state of the artist and are sure that something must be wrong with them and the way they think. That is to say, there is also an observed fetishization of strangeness in certain cases where eccentricity and quirky behaviors are viewed in the trope of the manic pixie dream girl. Generally, being “othered” isn’t ideal for anyone. Nonchalance is also observed as a social mannerism as we utilize nonchalance to make our true feelings on different matters discrete for the sake of others. When we experience art, we have the perception of others in our minds, preventing us from fully receiving and participating in our engagement with a piece of art. How does one fully approach the balance of criticism and engagement when interrogating art? It’s difficult.
We not only police the manner in which we engage with art, but also the way we prioritize our time. Students frequently opt to devote their time to organizations and activities that will look good on their resume or advance their career, whether or not they find genuine enjoyment in these endeavors. It is difficult to separate the desire do things you love for the sake of passion from the expectations of constant commitment to academic advancement. It’s not an uncommon thing for students at Carnegie Mellon to switch majors despite their initial major being a field the student was deeply passionate about. For some students, the academic framing can suck all the joy out of the way they engage with their studies. This can make it difficult to have fun doing the thing you love while also studying it.
The pressure to pursue excellence in all pursuits has also fueled the rise of nonchalance. If we can’t do something right the first time, it’s difficult to justify commitment to that thing when you could be doing something you are better at. You aren’t supposed to care that much about getting better at things or expanding your horizons — you take things as they are and as they come. When things don’t come to us instinctively we put them down.
In summation: kill nonchalance. We urge readers to reject being “just a chill guy” or “so normal girl tbh.” Embrace the feelings you carry with you and express them freely regardless of what the status quo is. Live your life primarily for yourself and explore the world with those who care as much about fully experiencing life as you do. The idea of having your passions be rejected or scoffed as seems scary, but if you experience it enough, it becomes less scary and you have a better idea of who exactly is standing in the way of the life you want to live. Emotions don’t have to be this terrifying thing that we reject and respond to with nonchalance. In the words of Sky Ferreira, “everything is embarrassing.” But at the end of the day, that’s fine. Life doesn’t need to be a contest of who can care the least. To quote Ferreira once more, “Acting like it’s nothing? Such a bore. I saw the truth and I just can’t ignore. You’re trying to hold the heart that can’t be stored.” Stop hating everything, everything that could’ve been. Things that could have been your anything don’t need to be embarrassing.
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